Ever Wonder?
by Fairady
Summary: Ever wonder why some things happened in the series?
1. Name

Disclaimer: I don't own them and I make no money from this. If, however, the creators of this anime ever find themselves in need of a caretaker for a certain one-eyed Irish man...

Warnings: Not much now. Just my own brand of short lame humor.

Notes: Ever find yourself wondering about some strange little thing from the anime? I wondered about Yohji's underwear.

Ever Wonder?  
by Fairady

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"Omi!"

Omi looked up from his laptop as Ken barged into his room with a load of clothing. The boy blinked curiously as Ken dropped it all onto the floor. "You did it again!"

"Again?" He had no idea what the Ken was talking about. Warily poking the pile with a toe he realized it was all underwear. "Oh! Sorry, Ken! I tried to keep everyone's clothes separate. I really tried this time."

He had. It had been Omi's turn for laundry duty, the one chore he truly hated. Despite the fact that they could afford it there was no room in the four assassin's home for a personal washing machine. So, all of the laundry had to be done at a public laundromat. Emphasis on the public.

Omi had been forced to use every skill he'd learned as an assassin at the laundromat to protect their clothes. The flower shop's fan club had somehow found their newest laundromat and had descended upon it in droves. He'd been too busy snatching clothes back from the horde to truly worry about what belonged to whom.

Under such stressing conditions it wasn't really his fault that he'd mixed Yohji's underwear with Ken's. Again. Omi had been too worried about getting his favorite shirt back to really worry about the other's laundry. The e-bay bid for it still had another hour to go, and he was currently out bidding two others for it.

"I have an idea," Omi sighed as he gathered up his laptop. There would be less chance of him being interrupted on the roof. "Why don't you put your name on your own underwear? Then I won't mix yours up with Yohji's."

"What!" Ken stared down at the boy in utter horror at the suggestion. "My mom used to do that when I was a kid. I felt like such a dork!" He crossed his arms and glared stubbornly down at the underwear. "I'm not doing it again!"

Yep, that was the response he'd expected. Omi smiled slightly, hoping it looked somewhat cheerful as he left the room. "Well I'll just have to try harder next time."

Ken pouted as the door closed behind the boy. He really couldn't understand how Omi always mixed his underwear with Yohji's. It wasn't that hard to tell the difference between boxers and thongs!

Ken didn't want any of the other man's clothes near him. Especially his underwear. Who knew where they'd been. Maybe it would be better if he wrote his name on his own boxers. He flushed as he remembered the taunts he'd gotten as a kid for it. Ken's eyes narrowed thoughtfully. What if...?

"Yes," he smiled brightly. He had a much better idea.

Humming to himself the brunette found a permanent marker and sat on the floor. Uncapping it he reached out for the first thong on the pile. Ken thought that Omi's idea was a very good one indeed.

And so Yohji had his name written on his underwear, and Ken didn't feel like a dork. Omi never did mix their underwear up again. Though Aya has been after him about mixing up his shirts with Ken's. Not that anyone noticed a difference. Omi, unfortunately, lost his favorite shirt to a last minute bidder named 'pr0d1gy.'

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	2. Decoy

Disclaimer: I don't own them and I make no money from this. If, however, the creators of this anime ever find themselves in need of a caretaker for a certain one-eyed Irish man...

Warnings: Not much now. Just my own brand of short lame humor.

Notes: Ever find yourself wondering about some strange little thing from the anime? I wondered about how they got Ken to dress in drag, and how they just so happened to have a dress that fit Mai's.

Ever Wonder?  
by Fairady

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That's it. Just a little more...

CONNECTION LOST.

"Dammit!" Omi scowled at the computer screen frustrated that he'd lost the trail. "I'm getting nowhere with this."

"Huh? You still trying to find that girl that bought your shirt?" Yohji glided down the stairs to stand behind the angry teen. "Give it up."

"It's my favorite shirt Yohji!" Omi wailed. "I need to find the person who won it off eBay and get it back."

Yohji sighed, "You'll have to do it later. We have recon to do."

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"Another set! Can't she make up her mind?"

Yohji chuckled at Omi's incredulous expression, and peered through the binoculars into the apartment. Mai was holding a dark blue print shirt against herself, obviously considering another change of clothes.

"She's a woman Omi and that's the way they are. You got to understand, a women will dress up for anything," Mai threw the shirt across the room and began to furiously dig through her closet. "This shouldn't be too hard."

Omi stared up at the window dubiously. "But how are we supposed to get an outfit similar to hers if she won't stop changing her mind? The stores will be closing in a few hours, and we can't go tomorrow."

"That's why I'm here," Yohji slipped the binoculars back into their case. "What ever outfit she chooses, I can guarantee it'll be one of the last three she tried on."

"Are you sure?"

"Of course," Yohji smirked. "I have yet to meet another man that knows women better than I do. Lets go."

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"I wondered why you needed me to come along," Omi growled as he was dragged into the clothing store.

"Shut-up and play along," Yohji scanned the shop and made his way towards a pretty looking blonde. "Uh- um excuse me, miss? My little brother and I really need your help."

The woman blushed and smiled at the two, "Of course. What can I do for you?"

Omi laughed nervously picking up his cue as Yohji kicked him, "It's kind of embarrassing. You see our sister went to visit an aunt for a week and we've been left to do the chores. And, well-"

"What he's trying to say is that we did the laundry and accidentally ruined some of her favorite clothes," Yohji looked down at the ground and clutched at his heart. "She'll kill us if she ever finds out. So, we just wanted to buy her some replacements before she comes back."

"Oh my," the clerk giggled, "I'd like to but I don't think we can do anything without knowing her sizes."

"You don't have to worry about that!" Yohji grinned and slapped Omi's back. "They're twins, and they're the same exact size right now. If she didn't have longer hair I'd never be able to tell them apart."

"Really?" The woman took in Omi's embarrassed smile. "Then I guess I can help you."

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"I can see one glaring problem with this plan right now," Omi said.

Yohji grinned rolling the bags up to fit in the trunk. "Just one?"

"Only one that really matters," Omi snatched the bags out of Yohji's hands and carelessly shoved them into the small trunk. "I refuse to be the decoy."

"Now-"

"I refuse!" Omi stalked to the passenger side and pointedly refused to look back.

Chuckling Yohji slid in next to him and started the car. Contemplating the possibilities of getting Omi to go through with the plan he finally said, "I guess we'll just do what we've always done."

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"Three," Aya tossed his tile back into the bag and left the kitchen.

"Four," Yohji smirked.

"Two," Omi sighed in relief.

Ken groaned as he looked at his tile. He had the worst luck ever.

"Blank. Why does this always happen to me?" Ken scowled as he dropped the blank tile back into the bag.

"Bad luck, Ken," Yohji smirked as the younger man sulked out of the kitchen.

Omi watched him until the door swung shut. "You know it really isn't fair that Ken keeps getting the bad jobs."

"What?" Yohji smirked down at Omi. "You mean you really do want to dress in drag?"

"No, no!" Omi furiously shook his head. "What I meant was that someday Ken's going to find out that all the tiles are blank, and then he's going to murder us in our sleep."

"Maybe," Yohji agreed, "but until then I'll keep taking that chance so long as it means I don't have to dress in drag."

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"What the hell took so long!" Yohji hissed as soon as the door shut behind them. "I was running out of stories to tell them. Any longer and I'd have to do a strip dance for them."

Aya scowled and wordlessly pointed towards the corner of the room.

"Don't blame me!" Ken turned away from the mirror tugging at the badly fitting dress. "You bought this thing and it's in Omi's size! How the hell did you even think I'd fit in it in the first place?"

"Luck of the draw, Ken," Omi interrupted before Ken could really get going. He was quickly outfitting himself with his weapons, head cocked to one side as they could all hear the faint noise from inside the cabin still. "Now, let's get to work."

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End file.
